There is a lot of tension in the air at New Eden as a number of Yui’s students quietly wander in, sparing nary a word for any of their fellow trainees and quietly warm up or stare off into the distance, occasionally taking a swig from their drinking bottles once they leave the dressing room. Alice tries not to pay too much attention to their cold war as she makes her way towards the front door, ready to welcome in the next visitor.

Alice: Hey. Managed to take time out of your busy schedule to do security detail, huh?

Yuzuki: Shh! Come on, that’s not why I’m here. 

Alice: Really? We could use an extra pair of eyes, though. Especially one with the patience of a saint.

Yuzuki: (She briefly takes her glasses off and puts them back on, as if expecting some sort of “four-eyes” joke) Well, recently, I’m not sure how much patience I really have, honestly… just here to check things out.

Alice: Hmm… Sorry, sis. You okay?

Yuzuki: (She shakes her head) Yeah, yeah, everything’s fine. As good as we can do after everything. 

Alice: I’m glad you’re here.

Yuzuki: (She gives a two-fingered salute with a little smile) So who’s getting along best here these days? 

Yui’s office door opens, and Yui herself peeks out, making sure the curtains are sufficiently drawn. Giving a satisfied nod, she emerges, transformed and clapping her hands together once.

Yui: A’ight! Everyone seems warmed up, yeah? Ah, Yuzu, good to see ya! To answer your question, that’d be Seia. She’s probably the best one of my regulars.

Alice: … Not sure you’re supposed to say stuff like that out loud.

Yuzuki: Wow, pretty name. (She scans the gym) That one with the katana?  

Yui: That’s Tomomi. The uh, slow start, let’s just say. Seia’s the one with the cane.

Yuzuki: Sh-she’s bl– has a visual impairment? How’s that work? 

Yui: If we’re bein’ technical and literal, she’s not blind at all, thanks to the genie cat. But y’know, it’s the damnedest thing, the brain doesn’t really process the information right if you haven’t used your eyes in over sixteen years. If you really want a demonstration, I’ll have her use her power. It’s a trip, first time she lets it loose.

Yuzuki: I’m more curious how she, um… 

Seia: (She climbs out of the leg press machine. She comes over with surprisingly little difficulty, now familiar with the layout of the gym) Hello. I heard my name over here. You’re someone new.

Yuzuki: Oh, yes, h-hello. I’m Yuzuki, one of Yui’s friends. 

Alice: She’s… probably the most experienced Puella in town, too? You can ask her anything about hunting Witches. Or dating si—

Yuzuki: Have you started hunting Witches already…?

Seia: Mm. I hunted three to stay alive before I started training here. Hunger waits for no girl. 

Yuzuki: Oh, wow. How did you…? I mean, that’s not…?

Seia: How did I while I’m blind, you mean? Luckily I got a good power that works, so long as my opponent isn’t too clever. None of the Witches have been. (She turns to Yui) They aren’t usually very intelligent, right?

Yui: Typically, no. They run on instinct and their sole, lingering regret from bein’ human. Sometimes you get one like mine, but that’s probably more of a Malefica trait than something you’d find in the wild.

Seia: So I won’t be Witch bacon for a little while longer. Good. 

Yuzuki: You went out hunting all by yourself?

Seia: Twice before I met Aoi’s group, then not again until we were all holed up during those Balancers. Monsieur Colère was with me the last time, though he couldn’t really help me fight. 

Yuzuki: Wow, that’s impressive. I don’t know how you did that alone. 

Alice: … says the girl who once took down a Witch with nothing but some homemade explosives.

Seia: (She brings her large braid around to the front, tilting her head and stroking it with both hands in an exaggerated display of mock shyness) 

Yuzuki: What about the other trainees? 

Yui: Ayumi has come a long way since she started training here. Couldn’t hardly transform, let alone fight when she first walked in a couple months ago. But she’s put in a lot of work, probably takes it the most seriously out of anyone I’ve met. No offense, Seia. (She glances towards the other side of the ring from her office, watching Ayumi and Tomomi talking. Ayumi’s motions indicate that she’s giving her friend advice on combat stances) Just, her drive to improve is really impressive.

Seia: I have the attitude of a healthy professional who has her health and family to think about. 

Yui: Man, not a lot gets to you. It’s, uh… weirdly refreshing, to be honest. Anyway, Yuzu, sorry you came here to probably just watch us all spar and train and stuff, but uh… yeah, just in case. (Her gaze falls to Tomomi, who has just drawn her katana and taken a few practice swings) …Y’never really know with these sorts of things.

Yuzuki: I could probably give her some pointers with a katana. Though most katana swordsmanship is about fighting another person with a sword, not using it on a Witch. It’s a really different skill set. 

Yui: I’ve never really tried to fight with one before, actually. Just my staff. …And these fists o’ mine.

Yuzuki: Probably still better for the job… a katana is a little short and small compared to how big most Witches are. 

Alice: Pretty sure most conventional logic goes out of the window as far as you guys are concerned. You could probably slice through a tentacle with a butter knife, or break a bone with a banana.

Yui: …Tomomi’s heart’s not in the right place just yet, but she’s getting there. Real tough, though. Puts up a hell of a fight. I have to take her seriously every time we go at it.

Yuzuki: H-how seriously are you going at these fights with your pupils…?

Yui: Depends on what they put on the questionnaire. (beat) …I’m never fighting to kill, if that’s what you mean.

Yuzuki: Do you spar with Seia-san too?

Seia: (She lifts her eyes to the ceiling, letting Yui answer) 

Yui: Yep. She’s getting better without her power, too. When she uses it, though, it’s a total wash. I just can’t fight in the dark.

Seia: I guess that’s what happens when we both specialize in the same weapon. You know more about it than I do. 

Yui: Fighting in general just comes naturally to me. I just try to rally against it. 

Seia: Sadly, I don’t know if Witches— or Balancers— ever plan on leaving us alone. 

Alice: You could always join the Balancers, I guess. I hear Kyubey’s on the lookout for someone who can kick Yui’s ass.

The gym door opens, and in walks Shinju. She stops abruptly at the large collection of people near the entrance. 

Shinju: Oh, hey. Hello, Seia. Yui. 

Yui: (She can’t help but stare for a second, before shaking her head, normalizing her tone) Yo, Shinju. Sup? Didn’t think you needed training, eh?

Shinju: Well, if I want to be serious about this, I shouldn’t turn down any training, y’know? 

Alice: Right, lemme go get you one of those infamous questionnaires, then. (with a self-assured flick of her wrist, she darts off into Yui’s office)

Yui: (She shrugs, but her expression is relaxed) A’ight, so what’cha lookin’ for? Sparring? Magical focus? Uh… we got workout equipment, too.

Shinju: Huh, I didn’t know you had such a varied menu. What are most people working on ‘round here? 

Ayumi: Ah! Um, Tomomi-chan and I are just working on our weapon form. Stances, that sort of thing.

Shinju: Hmm. I have an umbrella. I don’t think there’s really any form for those. I guess it’s just like a baton or a staff?

Ayumi: Umbrella…?

Tomomi: I’m uh, kind of imagining you wielding it like a sword or something. Am I in the ballpark here?

Shinju: Yeah, but you can’t cut with the edge of an umbrella. I have a water cutter, but it comes straight out the tip and you hold it like… this. (She demonstrates with her hands) 

Tomomi: (As if on instinct, or perhaps reflex, she holds her katana ready, before promptly relaxing) Huh… that’s pretty cool. I’m guessing it can cut through things like metal and stuff, right?

Shinju: Yeah… it gets the job done. Not sure any real weapon is held like that, though…

Tomomi: …I gotta see this in action sometime.

Shinju: Ehe, it’s a little dangerous for a spar… cleaving people in half is definitely too much for a practice bout. 

Tomomi: …Maybe sometime outside of the gym. We’re supposedly hardy enough for—

Chihiro: (At that moment, Chihiro speaks up, raw frustration laced in her voice.) Can we focus? Has anyone heard from that foreign girl in the last few weeks?!

Shinju: Foreign girl?

Seia: Did she go back to her home country? She must have to eventually. 

Haruki: That’s been my guess, but—

Chihiro: Don’t keep kicking that can! Something happened, I just know it, okay? I mean, first, she’s here, facing off against Arashi-sensei, and the next, she’s gone, without a trace?! And no one else finds that strange?!

Seia: (She turns and speaks with complete monotone unseriousness) Yui, did you beat up the foreign girl in a back alley? 

Yui: What? No! (She raises her voice as she addresses the crowd) What part of come-and-go training wasn’t made clear last time this came up?

Shinju: … (She looks around carefully at all the girls’ reactions) You mean, like, people can come in whenever and stop whenever and you won’t ask questions? 

Yui: Pretty much. Why would I hold someone at gunpoint to come back if they don’t want to?

Yuzuki: Well, we’re all Puellae… you never know what’ll happen to somebody after they walk out that door… 

Yui: Look, if I get a telepathy call from someone in trouble in a Labyrinth, sure, I’ll go check it out. But outreach isn’t my thing. People come here to improve themselves, learn to fight, that sorta thing. And sometimes, they just stop comin’ ‘cause they don’t need what I offer anymore. That’s not my problem, okay?

Chihiro: Tsk. Easy for you to be so dismissive, isn’t it? Does anyone else not see the massive red flags right now?

Seia: You all came and attacked us together. If any of us were out for revenge, it wouldn’t just be the one girl, right? 

Tomomi: Not that I’m a huge fan of Arashi-sensei or anything, but Yamano-san has a point.

Haruki: Not that Arashi-sensei isn’t capable of—

Chihiro: No! I’m not letting you gaslight me into believing that Arashi didn’t—

Ayumi: H-Hey, you guys, no one has any proof of—

At this point, the gym dissolves into a fit of bickering.

After enduring it for a few moments, Seia quietly wanders over to where she left her bag by the exercise equipment. Finding it, she pulls out a large whistle. Blowing it produces an ear-piercing sound to get everyone’s attention and stop the argument. Everyone, save for Yui and Shinju flinched from the sound.

Yui: …I get it. I’m comin’ off dismissive, yeah? But think about it. I fought that Evelyn Adams chick here, and then I left. Y’all saw her after that, right? One of you had to. But when I left, she was still in New Eden. Right there in the corner of that ring. 

Shinju: Evelyn Adams? You got her full name outta just that?

Yui: I asked her, when we were fighting one on one.

Seia: Calling people by their full names… it’s important to Yui. 

The crowd, bickering not even a minute earlier, becomes a dull murmur.

Tomomi: …Did any of us learn her full name?

Ayumi: You didn’t even ask?

Haruki: …

Chihiro: (She mumbles a half-hearted apology, seeming to back down from her accusation)

Yui: As you were, then. (She returns to her office, carefully closing the door behind her)

Shinju: (After a short pause, she steps forward, hands on hips, ever the extrovert) Right! So, what do we do for training around here? 

Tomomi: (Tomomi breaks the awkward silence first) Well, uh… sparring, comparing powers, exercise equipment, that sorta thing. When Arashi-sensei isn’t running us like a drill sergeant, she offers a lot of insight to our magical abilities. …I hate to admit it, since I started all this, but she’s pretty good at what she does.

Shinju: Uh, drill sergeant? You mean, like… 

Tomomi: (She sighs, slumping a bit) She’s a total hardass, man. Don’t get me wrong, it’s kinda worth it, since I haven’t struggled with a Witch since taking her seriously, but god damn… don’t piss this teacher off. It’s nothing like high school… 

Shinju: I mean, I know some real drill sergeants, and for the real thing there’s a reason they act that way at the beginning. You know, with real drill sergeants at least. At the beginning. 

Ayumi: If we’re being technical, this is the beginning for most of us. 

Haruki: Hey!

Ayumi: Tomomi was kind of a problem child at first.

Tomomi: How was I supposed to know how bad Arashi was gonna flip just because I was overconfident, huh?!

Shinju: Uh, what happened, exactly? 

Tomomi: I… answered a “5” on her little interview sheet for confidence. She kicked my ass. 

Shinju: Wha… just for that?? 

Seia: I put down a 2, by the way. 

Tomomi: …She also kicked my ass for showin’ up on a Wednesday and transforming.

Ayumi: In front of a street-facing window!

Haruki: What?! Are you stupid or something?

Shinju: Wow. I mean, depending on how much they saw, a passerby might just think you were a quick-change cosplayer or something, but yikes.

Tomomi: Broken arms aren’t fun, even if we can heal it with magic… (She rolls her shoulder with a sigh)

Shinju: Y-you mean she broke your arm?? 

Tomomi: You try getting tossed down a flight of stairs and not breaking an arm!

Shinju: I’m surprised y’all still came back after something like that! I’d probably pitch a fit and never come back. 

Tomomi: W-Well, I tried to maybe… get even. And failed.

Seia: I remember that. One of you almost shot me. 

Haruki: …Sorry.

Tomomi: (She grumbles) But hey, water under the bridge, right?

Seia: (She shakes her head, hugging herself) If you’d hit that shot, my sis would be out her older sister. Are you prepared to deal with that? 

Haruki: …

Seia: Yes, in the end, having a loving family is the most important. Let’s not shoot at each other or Yui. 

Shinju: Yeah, well, she shouldn’t be throwing people down stairs and breaking arms either. 

Haruki: Hmph. See? The outsider even agrees with us.

Ayumi: H-Hold on, there’s a lot of other circumstances—

Alice: (she puts a hand on Ayumi’s shoulder) Hey, you gotta speak up, Ayumi. Otherwise no-one’s gonna hear a word you’re trying to say, especially not these rabble rousers. (she glances at the other girls, sternly, though not without a hint of playfulness) Could hear you bickering up a storm from the office, you know. (she turns to Shinju, holding out a questionnaire) But yeah, if you feel like joining this noisy bunch, you’d better fill this in, Shinju. Don’t worry, you’re not signing over your soul… a second time.

Shinju: Hey, it was pretty worth it the first time. (She takes the questionnaire and a pen) Mm. How’d everybody get here if you’re supposed to keep this place a secret “on pain of death?” 

Tomomi: I invited the others from Biei, but that’s something I always wondered about.

Ayumi: I think she means it more to be “don’t tell Kyubey” or something.

Shinju: Sorta a “don’t talk about fight club” kinda thing. That’s an American movie. 

Alice: Oh, I know.

Tomomi: Er, right, that. Sure. Anyway, it’s a pain in the ass, but it’s working, that’s the moral of the story I guess.

Shinju: Guess the only way is for me to jump in myself. Sango won’t be coming out for this, of course. Wouldn’t fit in the building anyway… (She walks out into the gym proper, running her hand along the exercise machines) 

Alice: Don’t overdo it, okay? (she briefly touches Shinju’s shoulder before disappearing into the office)

Yuzuki: (She is in mid-sentence when Alice comes in, but continues anyway) … and those other days you’re open are enough to cover the gym’s finances? 

Alice: Sure as fuck hope so. The Maestro’s trust fund’s gotta run out eventually, right?

Yui: It’s more profitable than you’d think. I made a public display of kicking some jackass out for filming, so people just looking to get or stay in shape feel real comfy here, since I don’t put up with bullying or judgmental assholes.

Alice: Viral marketing!

Yuzuki: Filming? What was he filming? 

Yui: Himself, working out. But also other people working out in the background, which wasn’t cool. Found his socials, and he was making super judgmental comments about the others. So when he came in the next day, I told him if he wanted to work out, to leave the camera phone at home. He got pissy. I kicked his ass out.

Yuzuki: Is that a thing people do for their socials now…? (She shakes her head) Better than coming here to stalk on Aoi or something, I guess…

Alice: Tsh. They’d have to get through me first. Which, I admit, is not very hard, but still. Maybe slapping one dainty staff member around will make them see the error of their ways. 

Yui: That, and they’d regret it. But yeah, I guess that’s a trend now. They really need to do better, man. Mind their own business.

Yuzuki: Yeah… at least you’ve got plenty of people here who could fight off a creep. 

Yui: Man, they don’t even know… I’d love a chance to fuck up a creep right about now.

Alice: … Plenty of places in town where you can go for a fight if you’re looking for one.

Yui: …Yeah, true. But that isn’t really gonna…

Yuzuki: You won’t be satisfied if it’s not an all out Puella fight? 

Yui: (She shrugs, somewhat indifferent) You think someone who isn’t a Puella could come close to lasting in a fight with me?

Yuzuki: I dunno… maybe one of those weird Conductor guys with their crazy tricks, but outside of that… 

Alice: I don’t think another fight is what you need, Yui…

Yui: …I’m open to suggestions.

Alice: You can afford a counselor. I know you can’t exactly speak candidly about all this Puella stuff, but grief is universal.

Yuzuki: I don’t think my mom would want to treat someone who’s a friend of her daughter, but she could recommend somebody. 

Yui: …Sure, maybe. Maybe a shrink could help me with the part of me that misses Mei and feels responsible for her death. Maybe someone could talk sense into my human brain. …Y’know, the thing that stopped being real when I made a wish on the cat. The other half of my soul, it knows one thing. Sabrina speaks one language, and that’s fighting. …Losing Mei gave her power. Power that can’t be talked away. That’s… man, I wish that’s how Witches worked. Yuzu… I sincerely doubt there’s any answer to this than the obvious, but I don’t suppose you’re up for the fight I’m looking for, are ya?

Yuzuki: Me? Y-you’re barking up the wrong tree. I don’t really have any combat ability worth talking about… even if I agreed, it wouldn’t be satisfying… 

Yui: You’re still tougher than you think you are. …But yeah, you’re more defensive than offensive. Outside that bubble asphyxiation trick. Doubt that’d work on calming Sabrina down… 

Alice: I know you’re not exactly besties, but… Didn’t Hanako learn to harmonize with her Witch from Kiwako? That might work if you want to confront yours.

Yui: She’s stronger, sure. But remember? I’ve fought her a few times now, and uh… she has heart, sure, but I don’t think she could really match me in a serious fight. Especially if Cecilia couldn’t.

Alice: I mean more, like… Maybe you can fight Sabrina herself? Like, in the Dreamscape or I dunno… Sorry.

Yui: Eh… um… I’d rather not sink back into feral Malefica again, if I can avoid it.

Yuzuki: Does it work like that? You can meet her separately down there?

Yui: Haven’t tried, to be honest. Also, don’t really have to, she’s just… always there. I mean, it’s gotta be kinda like you an’ Ikana, right? Could you see her in the Dreamscape, maybe?

Yuzuki: (She winces at the name) No… she hasn’t come up in a long while. I thought I was “winning” for a while, but now it seems like she’s… it’s not trying anymore or something. 

Yui: (She hesitates, but then leans in, as if embracing the distraction. Her eyes flash violet for a second.) …Want me to take a look? Give your soul a once-over?

Yuzuki: Huh? N-no, no, none of that, please… (She draws back) I don’t want to mess with it or… wake it up… 

Yui: (She looks genuinely surprised for a moment, then reclines back in her office chair) …A’ight, no worries. Well, if nothin’ else… how’d you deal with it? Like… all the shit you went through?

Yuzuki: Wh-what shit are we talking about specifically? 

Yui: I dunno, man… like, grief, loss, responsibility… dealin’ with everything. The shit that I’m bad at dealing with right now.

Yuzuki: Oh… like when Toi passed away? I don’t know… I got by by supporting Emiri. And I had my psychiatrist mom, of course. 

Alice: … Have you, eh, considered asking Aoi for help? It works for me.

Yui: I mean like, the emotion of grief. My Soul Gem’s pristine. …If only there was like a Puella specific counselor, y’know? If I find one, I’m headhunting for the clinic…

Yuzuki: That could help with weird Witch stuff you mean? Um… probably that kid Kiwako would know the most about that, but… 

Alice: I don’t even have a Soul Gem and Aoi can still cure my grief. Pretty sure the emotion grief and the capital-G Grief are… kinda the same?

Yui: Sorta? But also not? It’s… weird soul shit.

Alice: Spoken like a real expert.

Yuzuki: When it comes to souls, she is the expert… 

Yui: Man I wish I had any frame of reference, so I could explain this shit easier… 

Alice: You’ll have to be the frame of reference.